Last night, I had one of those indelible moments of grace – you know, the kind that washes over you & lifts a weight you didn’t even know you were carrying. I was sitting on a gazebo swing on the peak of a mountain at twilight, looking over rippling peaks & valleys towards the lights of the town where my new community gathers. The misty clouds sunk into the valleys like a hazy lake, yet revealed the fireworks display far off enough to appear 2 or 3 inches high when they exploded in miniature bursts.
Embraced by new, dear friends, I knew I had made a wise choice in requesting a Do Over, leaving everyone and everything I knew in exchange for this new life. Again. In a physical sense, I could tell which direction was West by the setting sun, and which way was South by the lights of the town in the distance. In a spiritual sense, after a year of disorientation, I felt oriented again. I know exactly where I am! And who I am! And regardless of who I’m with or where I end up, there I am!
Reminded of a Sanskrit mantra, Soham, which translates to “I am That”, I recall reciting this mantra over and over again, practicing with every encountered person, situation, and breath. “I am That” diffuses the seeming separation between ourselves and others. Between their motives and ours. Between our inner and outer worlds. “That I am” permeates the perceived barriers between ourselves and infinite grace.
UrbanDictionary.com defines a Do Over, like in our childhood games, as:
Do it over again and given grace or a free pass. This is granted automatically, is a mandatory implementation and any other persons involved in the do over must comply.
This can be used with a relationship, a project, a service performed or even an entire day, week, month, year or decade.
Contributing to my community, I just started volunteering at the public library once a week, selling donated books to the public for a small profit. In turn, the profits are used to purchase new library books which are free for borrowing. One of the books I picked up and read in a day was Melody Beattie’s The Lessons of Love: Rediscovering Our Passion for Life When it All Seems Too Hard to Take. Her recent blog post, Starting Over – Again, really hit home.
What I’ve learned so far about life, is that unexpected transformations can lead to huge growth spurts, if we are willing to allow ourselves to be stretched. Sometimes it seems to be to the point of breaking – breaking down, breaking up, breaking through. But it’s in the tiniest acts of faith and willingness to start over again, that the miracles come. When we put our feet back on the ground. Put on a fresh outfit. Put on a smile. Put out a helping hand. Put on a new attitude.
Requesting a Do Over is not a sign of weakness or failure, but a sign of faith and resiliency. The other folks who have survived their own transformations and come to thrive, will give you a hand up. And you will eventually help others up. Before you know it, you’ll be looking towards a new vista towards indescribable beauty, awed by this continuum of grace.
Think: In what ways are you being called to Do Over a big part of your life? How are you resisting? What gifts are right in front of you?
Say: Call out for a Do Over!
Do: You can Do Over any portion of your life that you want. That doesn’t mean erasing the past, but rather, trying on new ways of being as you move towards health. Allow yourself the freedom to play, to create, to experiment.